Lost in you
by NowakiStar
Summary: What if Misaki and Akihiko did end up together. Alternate ending to Shadow of the Day and for Dear Angel. T for naughty lanuage, 2 series of songfics in one. Has been REOPENED
1. Intro

_This is the infamous alternate ending to Shadow of the Day. If you haven't it, you probably won't understand this. Anyway, this first chapter will just cover a little bit of background. Like how Misaki met Shiki and their relationship. And naturally this one will be the happy ending for Akihiko and Misaki._

_Enjoy. (The next ones will be Songfics like with Shadow of the Day. This is just the intro)_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own Junjou Romantica or any of the songs. However I do have Romantica season 1 on DVD and the songs are on my iPod. Of course, this doesn't really count does it?_

--

Misaki eventually got a job working at a small diner. It wasn't the best job in the world, but he still didn't have anything he really wanted to do. And he did enjoy cooking so it wasn't too bad.

He could say he was very happy with his life though. He had dumped the love of his life, Usami Akihiko because he knew his brother wouldn't approve. Takahiro would never approve of any guy, but knowing it was his best friend would have only made it worse. Takahiro would never forgive that.

Of course Misaki didn't plan on introducing Takahiro to any guys he dated. He didn't even plan on dating after Akihiko. Until he met Aloe Shiki two years later.

Shiki reminded him of himself when he was younger. He was insecure about his orientation like Misaki had been. But he was also like Akihiko in looks. Misaki couldn't help but love him.

They'd started dating a couple months after they'd met. Akihiko had rushed him into a relationship without even thinking about how Misaki felt. Misaki didn't want to make that mistake. Even if he'd ended up loving Usami, and still did; he wanted things with Shiki to be different.

But like with Akihiko, Misaki refused to introduce him to Takahiro. No matter how much he loved him.

--

"Why can't you tell him?!" Shiki asked, pissed off, "I've introduced you to all of my friends!"

"You don't understand. My brother would hate me for this."

"You know, Misaki you always say that. And I'm starting to think you love your brother more than you like me."

Misaki blinked at the boy in front of him. Shiki had never rebelled like this before. He'd always been a good little Uke, and Misaki was always a gentle Seme.

"You know what, I'm leaving." Shiki said, walking toward the door of their apartment. "After you told me about Akihiko, I should have known it'd be the same for us."

"Shiki, please don't leave! Where will you go?" Misaki rushed to stop Shiki. He couldn't deal with another break up. Losing Akihiko was bad enough. Now he was losing Shiki for the same reason.

"Anywhere is better than here!" he yelled, slamming the door behind him.

Misaki stared for a moment at the door. His eyes began to water, but he didn't let himself cry. He pulled his cell phone from his pocket. _It was time,_ he decided. He needed to talk to an old friend of his. Someone he still loved, even after six years.

--

**Well, that's the intro. The next chapter/song will be **_**Lost in you**_**, like the title of this story.**

**Thank you for reading.**


	2. Lost In You

Well, I'm hoping not to disappoint anyone…

As for an actual sequel… I'm thinking about it.

**Lost in you by Three Days Grace.**

--

"_I always knew that you'd come back to get me. And you always that it wouldn't be easy to go back to the start to see where it all began. Or end up at the bottom to watch how it all ends."_

--

Aikawa hadn't given Misaki his number. She was too excited to be hearing from him to do much other than Fangirl-Scream. Somehow he'd gotten that Akihiko was still living at their old apartment, but for the most part she was going on about Usami not finishing his manuscripts.

"Sounds like the old him," Misaki said, as he walked toward the subway.

She stopped for a moment before telling him that she was going to murder him for whatever he'd done to upset Akihiko so much.

"Sorry, Aikawa," he muttered, knowing she was dead serious.

"You better be! I had to force him to write that last one! You know what, I will kill you! Unless you get over there now and…"

"I'm going there now, Aikawa,"

"Good," she sighed before asking, "Did you read the last one?"

He didn't need to ask what she meant by 'the last one.' Surly RITSCR wasn't his last book. But it was the last in _that _series. And it was the only one that really mattered anything.

"Yeah,"

"And?"

"And what?"

"What are you going to do?"

"Talk to him."

"And?"

"Again with the 'and.'"

"Well, I expect you to do a little more than talk to him! Geez, you guys were together for years…"

--

"_You always thought that I left myself open, but you didn't know I was already broken. I told myself it wouldn't be soo bad. But pulling away, you took everything I had."_

"_You tried to lie and say I was everything. Remember when I said 'I'm nothing without you'?"_

--

The subway seemed to go too slowly that night. When Misaki finally got to the apartment it was getting dark. He knocked a couple of times, wondering if Akihiko was only pretending to be gone.

"Usagi!" he called, banging a little harder.

Now that got him a reaction.

The door was flung open within seconds. Usami blinked at him before asking, "Is this a joke?"

"No," Misaki answered, "I just thought we should talk."

"Have you come home, Misaki?"

"I don't know."

--

"_Somehow I've found a way to get lost in you, let me inside. Let me get close to you. Change your mind? I'll get lost if you want me to._

_Somehow I found a way to get lost in you."_

"_Now every day, I find myself say, 'I want to get lost in you.' I'm nothing without you."_

--

**Well, I think this is all I can do without running into the next chapter. Lol. (All again for you) **

**Review Responses: Thanks to everyone for the great reviews. As for a lemon, I don't think I'll do one. Sorry, but I'm doing these for fun I don't want THAT kind of pressure. And as for Shiki dumping him fast. This is an alternate, ya know. It's not all supposed to make sense. Lol. **

**And yeah, Misaki as a Seme… There's a website called and I think he'd be Romantic Seme (If not the Uke we all know he is…) (Maybe Akihiko too?) cause he's selfless and… Yeah, nevermind. **


	3. All Again For You

_I must thank everyone for the reviews. And I'm gonna promise two chapters today! I've been soo busy writing my other stories. These music ones are sorta just excuses to neglect my other stories, though I do enjoy them. Oh, and luckily I've finished JH and am about to finish the Terrorist spoof. _

**All again for you by We the Kings.**

--Akihiko

"_Dedicated to the one I'll always love. The one who really messed me up."_

--

Akihiko finally got up around noon. He was still not a morning person, but somehow he managed to wake up before Aikawa showed up to harass him. _Some things would never change, _he thought. Then he remembered how much had changed.

Even though it had been six years, Akihiko hadn't yet moved on. He couldn't just pretend everything was all right and start up another relationship. Not when his heart still belonged to Misaki.

--

"_Now what's left are the memories."_

--

So what if they'd been apart longer than they'd been together. Those three years meant more to Akihiko than anything ever had.

Of course, life didn't have much a meaning anymore. Had it ever? No, it was all meaningless before Misaki showed up. And now that he was gone, Akihiko was back in the same hole he'd been in as a kid. Only it was worse now that he'd had a taste of happiness.

--

"_You were everything that's bad for me, make no apologies."_

--

Akihiko continued writing. It was the only thing he had left. It was his out-lit.

When he was writing, he could forget about the world and everything that happened with Misaki. Sadly, his dreams weren't as kind to him. Misaki showed up in them constantly. Sometimes they were good, sometimes they were bad. But no matter what, they'd always end. And that was the part that really messed him up.

He couldn't live without Misaki. Hadn't he said that once? It was true.

--

"_When you were mine… You know, we had it all in front of us. You were the one. I was in love. But you always hurt the one you lost. I couldn't get enough…"_

--

Akihiko knew that Misaki had moved on. And it was probably for the best. He hoped that one day he'd be able to. He'd moved after Takahiro after all. But for now, the fact that Misaki had moved on was enough. He wanted Misaki to be happy after all.

Even though he was still jealous, and miserable.

_It doesn't matter. He's happy now._

Then Misaki showed up at his apartment.

--

"_I'm crushed black and blue but you know I'd do it all again for you."_

--

**Yep, this was basically just bringing you up to speed with Akihiko. What happens now that Misaki is back is in the next chapter: Memory. **


	4. Memory

_*Sighs* Enjoy the story. This is my reward for finishing two stories today. Somehow I ended up promising Bonuses for both but hey, it'll work out. _

--

"_This may never start, we may fall apart. And I'd be your memory."_

--

"So, how's life been treating you?" Misaki asked, stepping into the familiar apartment.

"Not as well as you," Akihiko answered, watching him like a hawk. Misaki had tried to imagine what Usami would look like after soo many years. But he'd never thought he'd look soo… tired. Life really hadn't been fair to Akihiko. No wonder his hair turned gray so early.

"It wasn't exactly easy for me either," Misaki said, sitting on the couch next to Suzuki-san.

"How's the boyfriend?" Usami asked after a painful silence.

"He left me," Misaki said frowning. He didn't want to be having this conversion. Though he really didn't know what it was he wanted. He'd come for closure, he'd told himself. But seeing Akihiko was making that harder to believe every second. "It wasn't working out."

"So, you think you can just walk back into my life? Am I just your fall-back?"

"No!" Misaki said quickly.

"Then why are you here? To torture me even more?" Akihiko asked.

"No, I'm sorry. I'll leave if you want me too," Misaki said remembering how he'd felt when Akihiko had come to see him before.

--

"_This may never start, I'll tear us apart. Can I be your enemy? Losing (six years), waiting for you here… I'd be _**your**_ anything."_

--

"No," Akihiko said almost as quickly as Misaki had before. The look in his eyes was forgiving. "Didn't you read my book? I don't want you to be sad, Misaki."

Misaki nodded and looked up at the person he'd loved for soo long. It wasn't fair that life had torn them apart for so long. No, it wasn't life. It was Misaki's fault. Why couldn't he have just told Takahiro… He tried to imagine Takahiro's face. How betrayed he would feel.

Misaki couldn't do it.

"I love you, Misaki," Akihiko suddenly told him.

He looked up, startled. "I…" but he couldn't finish. He wanted to but he didn't want to hurt Akihiko again. He also didn't want to hurt himself.

"It's okay," Usami said, embracing him.

They stayed like that for a few minutes. It felt familiar even though it'd been a long time since they'd been together. All the old emotions started rising inside him again.

"Can we just stay like this forever?" Misaki asked.

"I was just thinking that," Usami said, holding him tighter.

--

"_My heart's beating faster, holding on to feel the same… This could never start. Tearing out my heart… Can I be your memory? Lost your sense of fear. Feelings disappear. Can I be your memory?"_

--

**And this is where I have to stop because otherwise I'll be entering the next chapter. Sigh. I may have to start putting two chapters together. Next one: I Wanna.**

**Review Please! Reviews make writers happy. Happy writers write more chapters.**


	5. I Wanna

_I Wanna by All American Rejects. (First time I heard this song, I thought, 'Wow, that's really gay.' And I didn't mean it rudely; it just seemed like a gay song. Just listen to it!)_

--

"_I never thought that I was soo blind. I can finally see the truth. It's me for you."_

--

Akihiko leaned forward after a moment. Misaki's eyes widened but he didn't move away. Akihiko couldn't help but smile. Misaki wanted him just as much as he wanted Misaki. He wondered briefly if this had all been a dream. But everything felt too real.

He pressed his lips against Misaki's gently. He knew he shouldn't rush things. He'd tried that before. And well… It hadn't worked out. He moved slowly, holding Misaki a little closer to him. Misaki kissed him back, and eventually pushed apart Akihiko's lips to taste him.

Usami couldn't believe Misaki was actually dominating their kiss. It wasn't… right somehow. Was Misaki… He stopped to look at the boy in front of him. It had been six years, but Misaki… No way. People couldn't change that much.

Misaki blushed and shifted a bit, "What's wrong?" he asked, shyly. Same old Misaki.

"You were kissing me." Usami said, causing the blush to darken. "Do it again."

"No way," Misaki tried stepping back but Akihiko wouldn't let him. He wasn't about to try 'gentle' or 'slow' after that kiss. No way. Misaki brought it upon himself.

--

"_Take everything that I know you'll break. And I give my life away, so far for you. Can you hear me say, 'Don't throw me away'? And there's no way out, I gotta hold you somehow."_

--

"I'm not kissing you," he said stubbornly.

"Misaki, you just did."

Usami ended up kissing him again, not because he was giving up but because he really wanted to kiss Misaki. Among other things.

Somehow they ended up on Akihiko's bed. He vowed not to do anything he'd later regret, which wasn't much when you think about it. Their mini make out session was only half dominated by Akihiko. He wasn't sure if he liked that or not. He'd always encouraged Misaki to be forceful but it wasn't like he could just make Misaki into a Seme. It just happened. Besides he enjoyed his job far too much to do that. Having Misaki try being dominate had been more of an idea, it wasn't like he'd actually considered it happening. Nor what that would mean for him later…

Either way, zero clothes came off.

Which may also have been a good thing because Akihiko wasn't sure how far Misaki had gone with Shiki. Seeing Misaki as anything but a stubborn Uke was hard enough to imagine. Thinking about him Seme-ing someone else was just sick. And if his sick thoughts were correct, he wasn't sure he wanted to deal with Seme Misaki. He'd probably want some kind of revenge for the stuff Akihiko did nine years ago when they'd first done it.

Misaki cuddled up to him later, something else that seemed really un-Misaki-ish. Cuddling with Akihiko wasn't very safe. But tonight he didn't try anything. He had just gotten Misaki back, they'd made out; he wasn't about to ruin things so quickly. He'd give Misaki a week and if he didn't come around, Akihiko knew how to get him to.

--

"_Tonight I'm weak. It's just another day without you. I can't sleep. I gave away the world away for you to hear me say don't throw me away. And there's no way out. I gotta hold you somehow. All I wanna do is touch you. I wanna, I wanna, I wanna touch you. You wanna touch me too. Every day, but all I have is time. Our love's the perfect crime."_

--

The next morning Akihiko woke up beside Misaki. Not only that, the upper half of Misaki's body had draped itself over him. He tried to fight back a smile. Misaki was just too cute…

He put his arm around him, causing him to look up. Of course, Misaki woke up before him.

"You hungry?" he asked.

"Yeah," Akihiko said, holding back his crude comments about wanting to eat Misaki.

"Okay," Misaki rolled off of him and stood up. Akihiko watched this sadly. "I'll make breakfast."

Usami waited awhile before following him. _I have to be good,_ he reminded himself. Of course, kissing was perfectly safe. Right? And touching. As long as it didn't get too personal.

Akihiko sighed, realizing he probably wasn't going to make it.

--

**Hope it wasn't too bad. **

**Next one is Better than Drugs. Don't forget to review what you think.**


	6. Better Than Drugs

_I am taking suggestions for the new one, Dear Angel. It's the real sequel to Shadow of the Day._

_**Better than drugs by Skillet**__._

--

"_Feel your every heartbeat. _

_Feel you on these empty nights. _

_Calm the ache, stop the shakes. _

_You calm my mind."_

--

Misaki couldn't help wondering if there was something wrong. Usami waited patiently for him while he cooked breakfast. It was kind of amazing actually. Totally different from the last time they met.

Misaki tried to push away the memory. It wasn't like he regretted anything. But things were definitely different now. For one thing, Akihiko seemed a little calmer now. Or at least he hadn't jumped Misaki yet this morning. And the night before Akihiko hadn't pushed him too far. Years ago, Misaki wouldn't believe it were possible for Usami to be so… sweet.

He bought the breakfast out and set it in front of them.

"Ah, real food for a change!" Akihiko said happily.

Misaki smiled, he loved feeling wanted, and sat down to eat. It was quiet for awhile, as Misaki tried to think of something to say. Akihiko eventually saved him by asking about Shiki.

"Well, he was a lot like me when we first met," Misaki said, a faint grin, "Shy about the whole gay thing, and… Well, maybe not as shy as me. We helped each other really…"

"And he left you?" Akihiko asked.

"Yeah," Misaki said, thinking about the break up. It was soo sudden; he still found it hard to believe. But he didn't want to tell Usami about it. He'd have to tell him why they broke up. Because of Takahiro, and Misaki's reluctance to tell him about their relationship.

"So," Akihiko hesitated before finally asking, "were you guys like… intimate?"

"Yeah," Misaki said after another tense moment. It was kind of weird to be talking about this stuff, even if it was with the-possibly-no-longer-pervert Usami. "Not as much as we were," he admitted, "but neither of us were total perverts, you know."

"Did you miss me at all?" Misaki finally realized that Akihiko had never replaced him, probably because he was still in love with Misaki. Even when he saw Misaki with Shiki, he hadn't replaced him. He was still loyal.

"Yeah," Misaki said, "All the time… I still love you, Usagi-san."

That was all it took for Akihiko to snap and drag Misaki upstairs. He really hadn't changed.

But… Again Akihiko didn't force him into anything. _What is your problem, _Misaki wondered as he reached inside of Akihiko's shirt teasingly, _don't you want this too?_

But Akihiko was still holding back. Misaki knew he was holding back, which he wasn't sure how to feel about. On one hand, it was very out-of-character for Usami. Was something wrong? Didn't he want to have sex with Misaki? On the other, saner hand, he wasn't sure he was ready to start that again. And it nice to think Akihiko was taking his time with him.

But Misaki wasn't sane; he'd proved that by coming back after all these years.

--

"_You're my escape from this messed up place._

_Cause you let me forget._

_You numb my pain._

_How can I tell you just all that you are?_

_What you do to me?"_

--

Akihiko knew he was being selfish, and he knew he was about to break his vow not to push Misaki into anything. But, he had gotten a little jealous. Misaki couldn't just replace him. He belonged to Akihiko, plain and simple.

_No,_ he reminded himself that things weren't the same. He had to respect Misaki or he'd lose him again.

It didn't help that Misaki was unconsciously doing everything Akihiko used to wish he would. He'd definitely gotten this experience somehow.

--

Misaki couldn't take it anymore. Akihiko wasn't responding like he was supposed to. He was still holding back, and his movements were starting to seem forced.

He hated himself for it, but he opened himself up to Usami. "If you… um, want to… you know…"

Akihiko blinked, surprised. But it wore off quickly. Those words were all he needed to kick things up another notch.

--

"_You're better than drugs._

_Addicted for life."_

--

**I don't know whether this chapter stinks or not. I'm tired, and sick. My rain has finally started coming. And after spending a day 'enjoying' it, I'm getting sick. Ugh, I hope it's just something I ate. **


	7. Beautiful Disaster

_I'm not sure when I'll post on Dear Angel, the real sequel, next because I'm still trying to set up the playlist. _

**Beautiful Disaster by Kelly Clarkson. (CD version without religion.)**

--

"_I don't know what he's after._

_But he's so beautiful, such a beautiful disaster._

_And if I could hold on to all the tears and the laughter…_

_Would it be beautiful, or just a beautiful disaster?"_

--

Akihiko watched Misaki sleeping that night. This Misaki was unquestionably different than the one he'd known all those years ago. Maybe it was because he wasn't fighting him about everything. Or maybe because he'd become a little more dominate. After all, he'd set the pace last night. This would have never happened before.

Not that Akihiko was complaining. A sexually confident Misaki was sort of… sexy?

But then again, he still had that same adorable look on his face.

Hell Misaki was cute period.

--

"_He's soft to the touch_

_But frayed at the ends he breaks._

_He's never enough_

_And still he's more than I can take."_

--

After thinking about it for a moment, Akihiko pushed all the thoughts from his head and just watched Misaki. The changes meant nothing. Misaki still loved him. That was all that mattered.

Even after six years, Akihiko was still in love with him. And now that Misaki had come back, Akihiko didn't plan or letting him leave.

He wouldn't let the one he loved be taken away again. He was going to talk to Takahiro, even if it meant admitting some pretty crazy stuff.

Misaki would probably get mad. But he'd come back, wouldn't he?

Selfless as he was, Misaki would never say just how much he wanted to stay with Akihiko. That's why he'd gone when Takahiro told him. He didn't want to be a problem.

This time, Akihiko was going to fight for him. Whether he liked it or not.

--

"_He's magick and myth._

_As strong as what I believe._

_A tragedy within._

_More damage than a soul should see._

_But do I try to change him?_

_So hard not to blame him._

_Hold on tight. Oh, hold on tight."_

--

He didn't know what their future would be like. But somehow he knew they'd be together. It wasn't going to be easy. But as long as he was with Misaki, Usami felt everything would be alright.

--

"_He drowns in his dreams._

_An exquisite extreme._

_I know he's as damned as he seems._

_And more heaven than a heart could hold._

_And if I try to save him,_

_My whole world could cave in._

_It just ain't right. It just ain't right."_

--

**Thank you for reading. In a way, this is not the end of the story. I'm going to do an alternate to this alternate ending. If that makes sense. **

_What if Akihiko hadn't taking Misaki back? Lol._

_Next chapter: __**Apologize.**___


	8. Note!

Note from Nowaki Star:

Somehow ever hearing Apologize, I kept thinking about what would happen if Akihiko rejected Misaki when he came back. So, these last three are basically a second version in which Misaki has to fight for Akihiko.

Yes, I am thinking about adding more after Beautiful Disaster.


	9. Apologize

_This is now the alternate ending to Dear Angel and will be finished... Um.. I guess this is a little while after they did it in Usami's car... And yeah, they apperanty went all the way... lol_

_(Misaki is now forced to fight for Usami.)_

**Apologize by Timbaland.**

"_I'm hearing what you say_

_But I just can't make a sound._

_You tell me that you need me_

_Then you go and cut me down?_

_But wait…_

_You tell me that you're sorry._

_Didn't think I'd turn around and say…_

_It's too late to apologize."_

Akihiko didn't think he'd ever see Misaki again. He'd dreamed about it, and always wished Misaki would come back. That he'd return to Akihiko's side.

"So, do you think I could…" Misaki looked up nervously, as if waiting for Akihiko to just take him back.

"I loved you, Misaki," he said, not meeting the boy's eyes.

"I love you too…"

"I said_ love__**d**_." Akihiko said cruelly. He still loved Misaki. But he wouldn't be the rebound guy. And that fight they'd had in the car had really woken him up. Misaki wasn't the same boy he'd loved all those years ago. And they could never go back.

"_I'd take another chance, take a fall, take a shot for you._

_And I need you like a heart needs a beat._

_But it's nothing new."_

"What are you saying?" Misaki asked after a few seconds.

"It's too late, Misaki." Usami held back a tear. He couldn't do this to himself. He woud not go through that again.

"Is… Is there someone else?"

"No," he admitted. "I just don't think it will work out."

"But… You still love me. You wrote..."

"Misaki, as I've told you before: my books are pure fiction."

"Usagi…" he started. But Misaki couldn't finish. He put his arms around Akihiko's neck. Usami couldn't help it. He hugged Misaki back. He let the boy cry on his shoulder. But he wouldn't let this boy get the better of him again. He'd learned from his mistakes and didn't plan to repeat them.

He couldn't…

"_I loved you with a fire red,_

_Now it's turning blue._

_And you saying sorry like the 'angel' heaven let me think was you._

_But I'm afraid it's too late to apologize."_

"**Oh, who am I kidding? I need you too, Misaki,"**

**I know, I wish I could write it too. Lol. **

**I promised you all happy endings right? So, I'm gonna have Misaki fight for Akihiko now. Although I love this ending. Lol. I'm soo cruel, eh?**


	10. What About Now?

_Um... Yeah, I don't know if you can even review on these chapters since they're redone... I guess we'll see. _

_**What about now by Chris Daughtry**_

"_Change the colors of the sky.  
And open up to  
The ways you made me feel alive,  
The ways I loved you.  
For all the things that never died,  
To make it through the night,  
Love will find you"_

"Usagi…" Misaki breathed. He couldn't believe it. He couldn't believe he was being rejected by Usami. Hadn't he always been the one claiming his love every two seconds. Misaki used to be embarrassed by it, but now he was wondering if he'd been missing out on something very special.

"Misaki, I just can't do this. I'm sorry, but you need to go."

Misaki just cried harder. There was no way he could let Usami go. He's given up everything just to come back to him and to be rejected now was like twisting the knife he'd stabbed into Misaki's heart when he drove away.

Misaki looked at him with tear filled eyes. He could tell Usami was lying. Misaki could read him like book, he didn't want him to leave. Always the hopeless romantic, he just wanted Misaki to prove things were going to be okay. Whatever it took, Misaki was willing to do it.

"_The sun is breaking in your eyes  
To start a new day.  
This broken heart can still survive  
With a touch of your grace.  
Shadows fade into the light.  
I am by your side,  
Where love will find you."_

-_  
_"Don't lie to me." Misaki suddenly challenged him.

Akihiko blinked. It always surprised him how easily Misaki could read into him. He fooled most people. But never Misaki…

There was no denying he loved him. And he wouldn't deny it to Misaki if asked straight out. But he didn't want to be hurt again. He'd never gotten over the boy. And that night had made it even worse. He'd almost had a chance, but Shiki had beat him.

And here he was, telling Akihiko everything he'd longed to hear. He didn't know how much longer he could stand this.

"I'm sorry… Misaki, just…" he could feel himself starting to cry now. Couldn't Misaki see he was breaking?

Surprise number two: Misaki kissed him.

"If you love me, then say so."

Ironically, Usami used to be the one saying that. Misaki had changed...

_What about now?  
What about today?  
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?  
What if our love never went away?  
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?  
Baby, before it's too late,  
What about now?_

"I love you,"

Relief showed in Misaki's eyes, but only for a second. "Then, please, can we get back together? I understand that things are different but…"

Akihiko shook his head, even though it was what he wanted most, "It will end the same as before. Please, neither of us need to go through that again."

"I'd do anything…"

"Would you tell Takahiro?"

**Well, this might be the worst thing I've ever published. Please realize this was rewritten... Ugh, I hate this happyending crap. Haha.**


	11. Without You

_Well... I hate this. I really really hate this. I'm sorry if it sucks. But, hey you guys wanted a happyending... _

"_Search for the answers I knew all along._

_I lost myself,_

_We all fall down._

_Never the wiser of what I've become._

_Alone I stand, a broken man."_

Misaki winced. He didn't want to believe Akihiko had just asked him that.

But didn't all good things come with a price.

Misaki hated himself. He was such a wimp. First he'd broken Akihiko's heart just to keep his life stable, something he'd never forgive himself for. And though Usami was brave enough to tell his best friend about their relationship but… Misaki wasn't sure he could tell his brother. He didn't want to risk it with Takahiro.

"Misaki?"

He looked up into the lavender-silver eyes of his "Usagi." After all this, how could he say no to Usagi?

"_All I have is one last chance._

_I won't turn my back on you._

_Take my hand, _

_Drag me down._

_If you fall then I will too._

_And I can save what's left of you."_

"Yes," he answered finally.

A familiar look showed on Akihiko's face. But just like after the movie, he didn't want to. He wanted to be embraced by the author, to feel his arms around him... He'd felt so empty without him.

-(Switching to Akihiko POV)

"_Pain so familiar_

_And close to the heart._

_No more, no less,_

_I won't forget."_

"_There's nothing left to lose,_

_The fight never ends._

_I can't face the dark, _

_Without You."_

Akihiko picked Misaki up and began carrying him upstairs. He wasn't fighting which was a nice change since before. Then again he didn't really remember Misaki fighting him in the car either... But he'd learned to just ignore it anyway so he didn't really remember.

Upstairs, he laid Misaki down on the bed. He swiftly removed his shirt before leaning over Misaki to whisper, "I'm going to-"

"I know, I know," Misaki said, blushing a tiny bit. Maybe there still was a little bit of old, cute Misaki left.

"_I wanted to forgive._

_I'm trying to forgive._

_Don't leave me here again._

_I'm with you forever._

_The End."_

**Well, mini smut in the next chapter. Hope this wasn't a total drag to read. I hated rereading it before I rewrote it. This sucked soo hard! Well, I guess I say that about anything ansty and dramatic... Well, maybe the mini smut in the next chapter will make up for it. (:**


	12. Farewell

**I'm sorry to have not updated in so long. I know not all of you know this, but I've been sick for a very long time and now, I've found out that I'm dying. If anyone wants to "adopt" this story or any of my others you may all feel free to do so. Good bye and love from Rhiannon, aka Nowaki Star**


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